Tuesday is my day off and I enjoyed it immensely. Then they posted the WOD for today and I was aghast. There was just so much to hate about it.

This is what I posted to Facebook. “CrossFit is seeing if I’m a dedicated nitwit or just a casual drop in. Tomorrow is run half a mile and then run 1/8 of a mile backwards and then run half a mile and then run 1/8 of a mile backwards. I loathe, abhor, detest, despise running and that’s just frontwards. I’m thinking running backwards thru the pothole parking lot is one of the dumber things I can think of for an old fart to be doing.”

So, am I a dedicated nitwit or just a casual drop in? I set my alarm after figuring out I would just row 1k and run frontwards the 200 meters. I woke up before the alarm went off. I dressed in my CrossFit Summerville: The Anvil shirt so if I died in the middle of the street, someone would know where to drag my carcass to be identified.

I figured I would get something out of the warm-up and the back squats. Warm-up started with a bunch of jump rope stuff and I managed to get the rope looped around both ankles at one time. This was not looking like a good day. We ended with ten wall balls and each and everyone went up perfectly to the nine foot mark and kissing the chalk line. So maybe it wasn’t all bad.

Today’s WOD as written:
Back squat 5@75% 3@85% 1@95%
(add 5 lbs to max and recalculate %)
2 rounds
800m run
200m run backward

This is a proscribed method of lifting for the back squats (push press and deadlifts). Wembly. Wetley. Something that starts with a W. The idea is to load and deload and increase incrementally. I’m unsure how this is supposed to really work because the weights we have only come in 2.5, 5, 10, 25, and 45 pounds. So the least amount you can add to a bar is 5 pounds since it has to be even on both sides. For someone whose back squat is 200 pounds, going to 205 is a 2% increase. For me, it is a 5% increase. On the push press, it was more than a 10% increase, but it is always five pounds addition and then percentages which can’t be made with the weights we have. Anyway, I worked at 78, 88, and 98 for the day and got them all.

Then the running shit. I might have mentioned once or a million times – I hate to run. I’m slow and get winded before I even start. I have no stamina and no endurance and neither has gotten appreciably better. I have been able to increase the amount of iron I move by leaps and bounds. Running – nope. I loathe it.

I wanted to row and then run forwards. Jason was coaching today. I told him the most I have ever run at one time without stopping was 600 meters. That wasn’t going to help me today. He bargained. 200 forwards and 100 backwards. I wouldn’t do the parking lot because of the potholes. I said I would run inside and how many laps would it take. He thought maybe five, but I had to get back outside anyway.

So I ran 200 meters and ran the whole way. This always leaves me panting for air so I stood in the doorway and panted for three deep breaths and then made six trips up and down the mats backwards. Steve was the only other athlete there today and he wasn’t even back from his first half mile yet. I was being too weenie.

I went outside and panted for a few breaths and then started running again and decided I needed to go to the 400 meter mark even if it was partly walking. I ran out 100 meters, walked 100 meters, turned around and walked 100 meters, ran 100 meters and panted in the doorway again before starting the backwards crap. When I finished, Jason asked if I had another 100 meters left and could I do a parking lot “sprint” and I thought I did, so I tried it. I was panting like a lizard on a hot rock by the time I was done at 9.59.

But I went 900 meters, 200 of it backwards and 200 of it walking. Jason was saying I got a new PR. I kept saying I didn’t run the whole way. He said his longest distance was 26.2 miles but he didn’t run the whole way. Did that mean he didn’t run a marathon?

After Steve got back, we did some stretching and then it was time to go home. I hate running. But I went anyway.