Work was ridiculously busy yesterday. I tried to get out of meeting so much so I could get more actual work done, but it didn’t work as well as I had hoped, but it was better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. I got some errands done on the way home from work.

Things were going along routinely and then I looked at the WOD and had to do some research. That led to me wanting to throw in the towel, quit, surrender, give up, and curl into a fetal position and stay there until I died.

It is all scalable and I can do anything and life is good and there is no reason to let a few electrons ruin one’s day and for the love of all that is holy, don’t let them defeat you.

I did a lot of this self-talk vacillating between death and conquest. There wasn’t much middle ground. It was all just horrible and why do I keep doing this to myself and I’ve been at it for 15 months and I still can’t do shit and why do I even try.

I lifted over 1500 pounds in a few deadlifts yesterday. I’m strong and healthy and have more stamina than I have in years. I can lunge down the mat without falling over and I can do damn burpees and real pushups although they are wormy and pull-ups with a band assist. I can squat ass to grass and get back up. I can do all sorts of things that most 60 year olds cannot do. Why is this so upsetting? Do what you can and tomorrow you can do more.

I got up and went but even at 5.15 I wasn’t sure it was really going to happen. I figured I could go for the warm-up and skill and then just leave or something. But at least I would show up. Warm-up started with a 400 meter run and then there was other stuff. I RXd the warm-up.

Today’s WOD as written:
10 min working on snatch technique
snatch 8k

There are many different lifts and lots of them are words used in other places. The snatch is lifting the bar from the ground, holding it close to your body and with a wide grip, lifting it while shrugging up your shoulders, bending your elbows in a scarecrow type thing, popping your hips, throwing the bar overhead while you drop into a full squat and receive the bar with your arms fully extended overhead in a very wide grip which throws of my balance. There are so many moving parts and it is such a coordinated move, that it is difficult. It is also taxing on the system because of the fact that you are moving weight around like it is a pillowcase or towel.

I did the math last night. 8000/22 = 363.63636363 ad infinitum. I have done a couple 22# snatch moves without falling on my ass. So perhaps I should just use the little sand filled PVC pipe which weighs 3.2 pounds. 8000/3.2 = 2500. Well, that’s wonderful. There are other size bars but CrossFit Summerville doesn’t own them.

I got there and was so grumpy it was lucky I wasn’t fire breathing. This was ludicrous. There was no reason for me to even show up. I should have just switched out my work week, except that if I missed today then to get the four days, I have to go three in a row and I’m too old for that, too.

I was near tears when I asked what was reasonable for me. Kim asked if I could work until seven. I should have asked what time it was before I said yes. Luckily these were just power snatches which means dip a little to receive the bar, but not into a full squat.

I managed 100 reps or 2,200 pounds over my head in 24.23. My arms were almost still working at that point but it wasn’t yet 7 AM. Too bad. I was shot. I quit. I hate to quit. Because I quit, I still feel like an ass and should have stayed home. However, I’m an old fart and lifted a ton over my head today without killing myself.

Tomorrow is a rest day and I need it for my body and for my head. This WOD was simply too much crap and I chose poorly. Even though I worked hard, I still feel defeated.

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